Give Life, Day 20

Image courtesy of Suriya Kankliang at

                        Image courtesy of Suriya Kankliang at

I have to admit. I’ve hit a wall. I’m not sure what to write about with this series and these challenges. I should know something about communication because I was a communications major in my undergrad. I should have ideas about talking because I love to talk and talk regularly. However, I’m drawing a blank and I wish I could share something innovative and new.

There’s nothing new under the sun. Isn’t that what Ecclesiastes says? Today’s topic is “there is a time to speak.” Conversation is a life blood of marriage. You don’t always need to talk for hours on end, but communicating your thoughts, emotions, ideas, desires, fears, wishes, and concerns will help your marriage thrive.

I tell my husband that I love to hear him talk, but he will humbly tell you he doesn’t always know what to say or how to sustain a conversation. Evens so, I love to hear his voice for several reasons:

  1. I feel closer to him. When he shares about his day, even the mundane things, I feel a deep connection to my husband. I feel like I know him better.
  2. His voice is soothing. I feel safe and at peace when I listen to him speak.
  3. His voice is manly… and therefore, sexy. Just listening to him talk sometimes can turn me on.
  4. His enthusiasm is contagious. When he gets excited, it’s attractive, even if I don’t fully understand what he’s talking about, and he needs to explain. It’s endearing.
  5. His words have wisdom and depth… not always, but sometimes he just says things that are so wise and leave me in awe, and what’s funny is it’s usually when he’s not even trying. I know he is a man seeking God when he speaks.
  6. He engages in deep discussions sometimes, and like me, he isn’t content until he knows the why and how of things.

When I looked at this list, I realized I hit major points of conversation and major needs – #5 is spiritual, #6 is intellectual/mental, #2 and #4 are physical (as in they incite a physical reaction), #1 is emotional, and #3 is sexual.

Taking the time to talk and listen, for conversation, is essential. The next time you listen to your man, take time to appreciate what you enjoy about his voice and his speech patterns and what he’s saying. Then think of uplifting words to say to him. Don’t try and force it. Let it come naturally.

Proverbs 18:21 reminds us that “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” You have an incredible impact on your husband with your choice of words. The MSG version of Proverbs 15:4 says, “Kind words heal and help, cutting words wound and maim.” The NLV says, “A gentle tongue is the tree of life, but a sinful tongue crushes the spirit.The tree of life! I love that! You have the power to speak life to your husband. Remember that. Again, it doesn’t have to be anything out of the ordinary. Your words can be incredibly simple, yet powerful and gentle and life-giving.

Let your husband know what pleases you. Let him know what you love about him. Let him know that you care. Appreciate him with your tongue. Give life with your words.


This is Day 20 of the 30 Dates in November Challenge 2016. Sign up here. Join us on the forums for the challenge of the day and participate in a supportive community.

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