The Kind Wife, Day 24

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I like to talk. A lot. I speak way more than my husband does. I enjoy communicating – as it was my major in college. I have a tendency to think before I speak. This is something I am working on because sometimes I don’t always say things to my husband in the best way. I don’t always have tact in my words or gentleness in my tone.

Proverbs 31:26 says, “She gives instructions with kindness” (NLT). The GNT says, “She speaks with gentle wisdom.” GWT says, “On her tongue there is tender instruction.” The TLB says, “Kindness is the rule for everything she says.” Think about it, dear lady friend. How much of an impact would you make in your marriage if everything you said to your husband was spoken in gentleness, tenderness, and kindness? How much of a difference would your instructions to your husband be if kindness were the rule for everything you say?

In Jeremiah 31:3-4, the Lord says to Israel, “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness. I will build you up again, and you, Virgin Israel, will be rebuilt. Again you will take up your timbrels and go out to dance with the joyful.

God woos us through His lovingkindness. Is this the kind of atmosphere you create in your home and in your marriage for your husband? Do you woo your husband? Do you honor him with your kind words? Do you make it easy for him to want to please you through your gentle tone? Do you invest into your marriage with tenderhearted love? 

The godly wife’s words reflect unconditional love. 

1 Corinthians 13:1-8 says,

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,  but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”

Her words mean nothing without love.

The godly wife attracts and draws her husband with kind words.

Proverbs 16:23  says, “The hearts of the wise make their mouths prudent,and their lips promote instruction.” It’s not enough that the Proverbs 31-wife speaks with wisdom. She must also speak kindly and with love.

Proverbs 16:24 says, “Kind words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” She attracts him to herself through a kind tone. Her words are a balm, healing and offering sweet love. 

Proverbs 15:4 says, “The soothing tongue is a tree of life,but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit.” Her words promote life, love, and kindness. Her words restore and attract instead of breaking and repelling. 

The godly wife is gentle when she gives instruction, building her husband up instead of tearing him down. 

Proverbs 15:1 says, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Instead of getting frustrated and snippy when my husband gets upset with me, I work to gently love him through my words and emotions. This builds trust and helps him to know we are in a safe place emotionally and that I love him, even if I am disagreeing with him.

Jesus tells us to learn from His example – “Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” Matthew 11:29. Do you provide a place of rest for your husband? Does he know he can trust and relax with you and that your words will be kind and gentle instead of harsh and judgmental? Humble yourself and bite your tongue when you feel the need to be defensive and rude, learning from Jesus’ example. Ephesians 4:2 says, “ Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”

The godly wife restores and refreshes her husband with her words.

You can disagree with your husband without being mean, rude, or disrespectful. You are even supposed to call him out on sin, but in a loving way, restoring him gently instead of harshly.

Galatians 6:1 says, “If someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.

She delights in refreshing him through her words, encouraging and uplifting him. Are you generous with your husband with your encouragement? Do you seek to refresh his soul with your life-giving words?  She works to be unified and to bring peace, love, and life through her words. 

2 Corinthians 13:11 says, “Finally, brothers and sisters, rejoice! Strive for full restoration, encourage one another, be of one mind, live in peace. And the God of love and peace will be with you.”

Now over to your email to do the daily challenges! 

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This post is Day 24 of the 30 Dates in November Challenge 2014. Sign-up via email. Receive daily challenges, additional encouragement, and extra goodies. 

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How do you show kindness and generosity in your marriage through your words?

Join the conversation on Twitter: #kindwife. Be sure to tag@BecomingHisEve

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