The Wise Wife, Day 23

Day 23

Proverbs 18:21 says, “ What you say can preserve life or destroy it; so you must accept the consequences of your words” (GNT).

Words are powerful. Words have the ability to heal and give life or to tear down and destroy life. This is why as a godly wife you must be so careful about what you say to your husband.

Proverbs 31:26 says, “She speaks with wisdom…” It’s a simple phrase but has a deep meaning. Wisdom is defined by Merriam-Webster Dictionary as “knowledge of what is proper or reasonable : good sense or judgment.” The Bible takes it a step further and calls Jesus our Wisdom.

God has united you with Christ Jesus. For our benefit God made Him to be wisdom itself. Christ made us right with God; He made us pure and holy, and He freed us from sin.” 1 Corinthians 1:30

If you want to speak wisely and kindly, you must start with understanding your relationship with Christ. On your own you can’t control your tongue. James 3:8 says, “No human can tame the tongue.” This is why we need Christ and His wisdom to intercede on our behalf and teach us how to be wise with our words. James 3:17  says, But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peaceloving,  considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.”

The godly wife speaks words that are pure. 

  •  “The Lord detests evil thoughts but gracious words are pure in His sight.” Proverbs 15:26
  • Do not let any unwholesome [or impure] talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Ephesians 4:29
  • Urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure…” Titus 2:4-5 

The godly wife speaks words that are peace-loving. 

  •  Remind the people… to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and always to be gentle toward everyone.” Titus 3:1-2
  • Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” Ephesians 4:3
  • Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.” Romans 14:19

The godly wife speaks words that are considerate. 

  • Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up.” Proverbs 12:25 
  • Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” Proverbs 16:24 
  • Words from the mouth of the wise are gracious, but fools are consumed by their own lips.” Ecclesiastes 10:12 

The godly wife speaks words that are submissive and respectful.

Wives must submit to your husbands’ leadership in the same way you submit to the Lord (TLB).” Ephesians 5:22 Don’t talk back to your husband.  My mom always said, “Yakkety yak, don’t talk back.” It was a silly little saying, but it has stuck in my head. Be respectful in your words toward your husband. If you don’t agree with his choice, it is okay to have a discussion with him, but you do need to respect his wishes and decisions. If it isn’t sinful, causing others to stumble, and if he isn’t asking you to join in his sin, submit to his leadership and guidance. 1 Peter 2:17 says, “Show proper respect to everyone…” And even if our husbands aren’t with the Lord, we are still to be respectful as 1 Peter 3:1 tells us, “Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives…” Your tone of voice, body language, and attitude say a lot to your husband.

The godly wife speaks words that are merciful.

  • Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32
  •  Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.” Luke 6:36

The godly wife speaks words that are full of good fruit. 

  • Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.” James 3:18
  • The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness and self-control.” Galatians 5:22-23 
  • “[May] your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God.” Philippians 1:9-11 

The godly wife speaks words that are impartial. 

  • Believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ must not show favoritism.” James 2:1
  • Do not judge, or you too will be judged.” Matthew 7:1
  • For the Lord gives wisdom;  from his mouth come knowledge and understanding. He holds success in store for the upright, he is a shield to those whose walk is blameless, for he guards the course of the just  and protects the way of his faithful ones. Then you will understand what is right and just and fair—every good path.” Proverbs 2:6-9 

The godly wife speaks words that are sincere. 

  • The Lord detests lying lips but he delights in people who are trustworthy.” Proverbs 12:22
  • Truthful lips endure forever,  but a lying tongue lasts only a moment.” Proverbs 12:19 
  • An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips.” Proverbs 24:26 

Now over to your email to do the daily challenges! 

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This post is Day 23 of the 30 Dates in November Challenge 2014. Sign-up via email. Receive daily challenges, additional encouragement, and extra goodies. 

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Do your words reflect the love of Christ in your heart? How do you practice these aspects of wise words in your own marriage?

Join the conversation on Twitter: #wisewords. Be sure to tag@BecomingHisEve

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