The Patient Wife, Day 15

DAY 15

I have never been good at sewing. I’m still the gal that takes her ripped holes to Grandma’s and asks her to fix them. It’s not like I can’t do it, but I’ve just never succeeded in cutting or sewing in a straight line. That’s why verses like Proverbs 31:19 freak me out a little.

“In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.”

In order to be a godly wife, do I have to sew all my own clothes and weave my own threads and crochet and knit? It’s just not my strong suit, God.

After praying about it, God gave me some insight into this passage that I was missing before. The Proverbs-31 wife is patient. I mean, she has to be if she sews all her own clothes and makes clothing for her family. I can be patient. That’s a trait I can aspire to.

Whether you sew or not isn’t the point. You can choose to be patient daily, to take care with your household tasks, to invest the time into your husband and family that they need. You can choose daily to clothe yourself in compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, forgiveness, and love.

*Why is patience so essential in a marriage? Because God calls us to be patient, especially with our husbands. Colossians 3:18 says, “Wives submit to your husbands as is fitting in the Lord.” What is one way we can submit? By being patient. Back up to verses 12-14 of Colossians 3.

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

Back up even farther. You’ve been raised with Christ, out of your dead, sinful, worldly ways. Your heart and mind is to be set on things above – kingdom-minded, remember?

Patience is the exact opposite mindset and lifestyle of the world we live in. I’m amazed, and then again, not so amazed, that you can start buying special Christmas items on sale right now before Thanksgiving is even here. Whatever happened to the excitement of Black Friday actually being on the Friday after Thanksgiving. Last year I went looking for pumpkin decor the week of Thanksgiving and I was told multiple places that they either didn’t have them or they were already in the small sale shelf in the back of the store. Whatever happened to waiting for something special… which is what makes it so special. The chaos of the Christmas season starting all the earlier isn’t going to help our mindset as patient wives. Holiday stress is just one more thing to drive a wedge in marriage.

*You cannot be perfectly unified if you are impatient. You cannot truly love your husband if you’re impatient. You cannot forgive your husband if you are impatient and holding a grievance against him. Without love, you have nothing and you are nothing as Paul states in 1 Corinthians 1. Remember, you are one of God’s chosen people – you’ve been made holy, you are dearly loved and He has forgiven you, wiped your slate clean, made you pure before Him, a new creation, a newly redeemed Eve!

As a result of this fantastic love of God and His entire redemptive work completed in your life, clothe yourself with compassion, kindness, and gentleness. Daily humble yourself before the Lord, remembering His eternal gift of salvation and the inheritance you’ve been given in His kingdom, and ask God to plant patience in your heart. Practice patience in your marriage garden bed not because you’re trying to look good or do better, but as a genuine fruit result of the Holy Spirit actively working in your life.

*Do you think about those articles of clothing when you’re getting dressed in the morning? Put on the patient blouse. Fasten the buttons of humility. Wear the necklace of compassion around your neck. Write gentleness and kindness on your heart every morning just as you’d wear your wedding ring faithfully. Otherwise you’ll expose your own pride and remember pride always comes before a fall (Proverbs 16:18).  Think of it another way. The plant of patience needs to be well-watered with humility. Pride dries up patience quickly.

But what if patience doesn’t fit? God-sized patience and Hannah-sized patience can often be too different sizes. I personally dislike wearing clothes that are too tight. If patience doesn’t fit my lifestyle, then I need to sit down and have a serious chat with God. If the amount of patience you have with your spouse is too tight (a.k.a. you have a short fuse), you need to have one-on-one time with God and search your heart before you go back into the dressing room and try on some God-sized patience.

*I originally shared these thoughts here and here

Now over to your email to do the daily challenges! 

BHE 30 Dates in November Challenge button 2

This post is Day 15 of the 30 Dates in November Challenge 2014. Sign-up via email. Receive daily challenges, additional encouragement, and extra goodies. 

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Do you think about clothing yourself in patience, compassion, and love when you get out of bed in the morning? Are you intentional about investing time into your husband? 

Join the conversation on Twitter: #patientwife. Be sure to tag@BecomingHisEve

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