Reclaim Sensuousness, Day 10
We’re so out of touch with our 5 senses. We live in a sense-numbing world – mindless activities like watching TV, surfing the Internet, playing repetitive games on our smartphones all play into this senselessness. We don’t even have to leave our homes to live, work, go to school, pay bills, connect with friends, be entertained, and even shop.
It’s time to reconnect with your senses, dear lady friend. It’s time to reclaim your sensuousness!
Think about your favorite sights, smells, tastes, sounds, and feels. Think about your most vivid memories. The smell of cinnamon and pine needles reminds me of Christmases as a child. The sound of Switchfoot’s Only Hope reminds me of Adam’s very romantic marriage proposal. The feel of warm sand between my toes and the smell of salt-laced air always reminds me of how wonderful it is to be at the beach. The taste of meaty chili reminds me of cold nights. The sight of the trees changing colors from brilliant greens to gorgeous golds and vibrant reds is a hint that autumn is beginning.
All of these experiences as sensual.
Karen Scalf Linamen writes in Pillow Talk, “Unless life touches us in tangible ways, we’re missing out on something grand.” She talks about orchestrating ensembles of sensations. “What if we made a conscious effort to exercise our senses – perhaps just minutes at a time – three to four times a day?”
Take a moment when waking up to drink in all that’s going on around you. Perhaps you smell the fresh hazelnut coffee brewing downstairs so delicious you can almost taste it and hear the pot gurgling happily, feel the ‘just right’ comfy spot under the warm sheets, see the happy sunshine peeking through your shades, and taste your husband’s minty-fresh breath as he kisses you awake.
Take a moment on your lunch hour to get outside and experience God’s creation (unless stuck in a rainstorm or blizzard) or sit by a window if it’s too cold. I love the sounds, sights, and smells of thunderstorms, and the feel of rain on my skin makes me feel alive. I feel close to God when I run or walk in the rain.
Take a moment to get in touch with your senses as you wind down in the evening. The “ah” feeling of sinking onto a comfy bed after a long, tiring day. The smell of a cinnamon vanilla candle burning softly in the background. The rhythmic sound of the furnace kicking on at night.
If you make a conscious effort to exercise and enjoy your five senses on a daily basis, if you look for ways to orchestrate ensembles of sensation, and if you stretch your physical boundaries beyond comfortable and sedentary living, then you will have laid the groundwork for more sensual living.”
Today’s 30 Minute Challenge (Nov 11th) Reclaim Sensuousness
*Today’s challenge is inspired by Pillow Talk.
Lay the groundwork for a sensuous evening. Think about what sights, sounds, tastes, feels, and smells enhance your sexual experience with your husband. Find new ways to stimulate your senses during lovemaking.
- Experiment with different lighting levels.
- Wear an article of clothing that you know turns your husband on (i.e. high heels, his tie, long, flowy skirt, etc)
- Make love in the complete dark.
- Try progressive foreplay. Start by making out like a teenager in your car on a rainy night, run inside and take a hot shower together and accelerate to touching, then move to the bedroom and make love, and finish with intimate snuggling on the living room couch.
- Try accenting your bedroom with a canopy over your bed, make a fort in your living room, or hang a string of Christmas lights.
- Light a crackling fire (if you have a fireplace).
- Try a romantic music playlist in the background.
- My husband and I once had sex during movie credits (don’t worry; we were watching the movie at home in our bedroom). All I can say is the experience can be “epic” with your “own” soundtrack in the background.
- Experiment with different types of music – ethnic, nature sounds, classical, jazz, rock, etc.
- Slow dance to “your song” in the living room beforehand.
- Make sounds during sex to indicate pleasure. Vocalize your delight.
- Let your husband know what you loved about sex… when you’re done. Give him positive feedback.
- Show him where you want his hands, lips, groin, etc to be.
- Take a shower together and enjoy the feel of the steamy water.
- Draw a bubble bath or sit in a Jacuzzi (if you can).
- Blindfold your husband. Select different objects with different textures and have your husband guess what he is feeling. (i.e. ice cube, feather, string of pearls, Playdoh, an orange peel, etc)
- Ask your husband what his favorite scents are. Go to a perfume or body lotion shop and ask a clerk to assist you in finding the perfect scent.
- Spritz your favorite perfume on your pillows.
- Purchase a new cologne for your husband or ask him to wear his favorite.
- Use a candle warmer. Turn it on about 30-45 minutes before you plan to be in the bedroom.
- Light scented candles or incense. Don’t be afraid to experiment with scents.
- Add drops of essential oil to a bath.
- If he’s up for it, purchase a flavored massage oil or chocolaty body paint.
- Make your own “body paint” with peanut butter, chocolate syrup, whipped cream, etc.
- Make up a snack tray of some of your favorites and a few special treats.
- Bake cinnamon rolls or another cinnamony treat (or bake his favorite cookies or pie).
- Serve traditional sensuous foods like oysters, chocolate covered strawberries or pears, or grapes.
- Hand feed each other.
- Try these traditional holiday foods to spice up your sex: cranberries, apples,ginger, maple, pumpkin, and pomegranates.
Don’t take yourself too seriously. Laugh. Have fun. Enjoy the sensational moments.
5 Minute Marathon
Now you might be saying, life’s too hectic. All the more reason you need to take a sensuous time-out. De-stress and take 2-3 deep breaths. Focus on the moment. What do you see? Hear? Smell? Taste? Feel?
Take It a Step Further
*I originally posted this idea on Pearl’s OysterBed – Unveiled.
Song of Solomon 7:11-13 says the king’s wife invites him willingly and eagerly to enjoy sex with her. She says, “Come, my beloved, let us go to the countryside, let us spend the night in the villages. Let us go early to the vineyards to see if the vines have budded, if their blossoms have opened, and if the pomegranates are in bloom—there I will give you my love. The mandrakes send out their fragrance, and at our door is every delicacy, both new and old, that I have stored up for you, my beloved.”
- Meditate on your husband throughout the day. Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus, authors of Intimate Issues write: “Solomon is not present and [the] Shulamith [woman] meditates on her husband’s body with erotic imagery. In her mind she undresses her husband, beginning at the top of his head and working her downward. She dwells on his sensuous lips, his muscular shoulders, and strong legs and ends her daydreaming by saying: ‘His mouth is full of sweetness. And he is wholly desirable.’ (5:16)… [her] thoughts prepare her to act out her sensuousness with her husband.”
- Think about aspects of his body that you love.
- Think about what turns you on.
- Fantasize about your husband.
- Send him flirt text messages or emails throughout the day hinting at your lovemaking plans for the evening.
- Take a shower or a bubble bath to get clean and to feel fresh. Don’t forget to shave.
- Wear lingerie and an outfit that is pretty and feminine.
- If you’re not sure how to do this, check out the tips I offer over on my blog in my post Is Dressing Sexy for My Husband Biblical?
- Do whatever you need to feel confident, sexy, and feminine. Put on your best. Psalm 45:11&13 says, “Let the king be enthralled by your beauty; honor him…all glorious is the princess within her chamber; her gown is interwoven with gold.”
- Replace your normal, everyday sheets with your best sheets.
- Spread a comfortable blanket on top of your bed or on your floor.
- Include plenty of pillows.
- De-clutter your room.
- Create a sensational ambiance using the ideas from above.
- Pour glasses of chilled wine, champagne, or sparkling cider and set out your favorite snacks, in case you get hungry.
- Put out any props you might want to use – a long strand of pearls, a feather boa, a feminine scarf, etc.
- Use your imaginations.
- Plan to go for a walk and hold hands.
- Connect intimately emotionally through conversation.
- Arrange for a babysitter and make reservations at your favorite restaurant. Lean over during dinner and whisper something like “I’m looking forward to our rendezvous in the bedroom later,” or “I’m wearing lacy underthings” in your husband’s ear, or try “I’m not wearing any underwear at all.” That should get him eager and ready!
- Plan to snuggle when you’re done making love.
- Feed each snacks as sex can work up an appetite.
- Lie on the bed and lovingly gaze on one another.
This post is Day 11 in of the 30 Dates in November Challenge.See related posts – Go Ahead! Be That Couple! 14 Things to Do In and Out of Bed, 6 Foods to Spice Up Holiday Sex, Give Yourself Permission to be a Sensuous Woman, and 8 Benefits of Early Morning Sex.
Share with Us
In reading about the 5 senses, is this new to you? Have you heard it before? What strikes you the most about this challenge?
- Posted in: 30 Dates in November ♦ 5 Love Languages ♦ Beauty ♦ Change and Growth ♦ Date Your Spouse ♦ Femininity and Womanhood ♦ Real Marriage ♦ Romance ♦ Sex ♦ Spicing Up the Bedroom
- Tagged: 30 Dates in November 2013, 5 Senses, Dates on a Budget, Foodie Dates, Music Dates, Spicing Up Sex, Stay at Home Dates, The Marriage Bed