Why Are You Really Doing This? Day 1

Why Are You Really Doing This? 30 Dates in November Challenge Day 1 from Becoming His Eve

Why Are You Really Doing This?

We cannot hope to initiate change if it first doesn’t begin in our hearts. You can’t hope to have success with 30 Dates in November if your attitude and thoughts aren’t first in the right place.

Why are you really doing this challenge?

To change your husband? Stop right now and go for some one-on-one time with the Lord. You can’t change your spouse.

To change yourself? While self-improvement isn’t necessarily a bad thing, that is not the ultimate goal of this challenge.

To gain recognition? This isn’t about letting everyone know what a great wife you are so you can pat yourself on the back at the end of the day.

Two weeks ago, I realized I couldn’t effectively complete this challenge, much less lead it, if my heart wasn’t right with God and my motivations weren’t pure. I must confess there was a small part of me that wanted to increase my readership in the month of November. I don’t want that to be my motivation at all.

Yes, I’d love to hear from all of you and find out that your relationship with God and your marriage is flourishing. Yes, I’d love to hear from you that you’re growing and learning. Yes, I’d love to hear that your marriage is better than ever… but that is by no means a victory I want to claim myself – the victory belongs to Christ.

Jesus is responsible for helping you grow deeper in your love for one another – not me. I am merely a catalyst, and hopefully, a fairly invisible one. Don’t listen to my words. Listen to the words of our amazing God. Listen for what He wants for you and your husband over the next 30 days!

Ultimately your motivation for doing the 30 Dates in November Challenge should be to glorify and honor God first through honoring your husband, not out a hidden agenda, but a pure and honest heart. Yes, the challenge is about loving your husband, but you can’t truly love your husband if you don’t first know the Source of all love – Jesus Christ. 

Today’s 30 Minute Challenge (Nov 1st): Pray Before You Start

Grab your Bible, a journal (or a piece of paper, or your laptop), and your favorite beverage of choice (a cup of coffee, tea, juice, water, etc). Head to someplace you can go without being interrupted for at least 30 minutes.

[1 min] Write out today’s Bible verse (Psalm 19:14).

[2 mins] Praise God for who He is and what He’s done.

[2 mins] Confess any sin you’re aware of in your heart right now.

[2 mins] Thank God for already going before you in this challenge, and not only waiting for you at the finish line, but how He will be walking you through the next 30 days.

[10 mins] Write down your motivations and reasons (positive and negative) for doing this challenge. Reflect on what you wrote. Ask yourself:

  • Do my motivations reflect a desire to please and honor God?
  • Do my motivations reflect a desire to please and honor my husband?
  • Am I expecting something in return for what I’m doing?
  • Are my motivations reflective of the work of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control)?
  • Are my thoughts focused on things that are lovely, true, noble, right, pure, and admirable?

[3 mins] Ask God to take away your negative motivations, and to give you God-honoring motivations. Ask God to give you the courage and strength to carry out this challenge in a manner pleasing to Him. Ask God to give a love like Jesus for your husband in the days ahead.

[10 mins] Consider your expectations for this challenge. What do you want to accomplish and what would you like to see God accomplish in you and your marriage by December 1st? Spend the remainder time praying for your marriage and for your husband. Jot down a few notes at the end so you can remember what you prayed for today.

5 Minute Marathon

Quiet your heart and meditate on today’s Bible verse (Psalm 19:14).

May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to You, Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.” Psalm 19:14

Write it out on an index card and put it someplace you’ll see it throughout the day.

Today’s Prayer

Oh God, Lover of my soul, You alone are worthy of all glory and praise! Your love and faithfulness has extended throughout all generations. I confess that I do not always reflect the change You’ve done in my heart or the love You so tenderly prove through Jesus Christ. Forgive me. Thank You for going before me on this journey. I want to honor You and my husband with my thoughts, emotions, desires, meditations, and actions. Mold my heart into Yours. May Your love live through me. I commit my journey over the next 30 days to You. Amen. 

Take It a Step Further

In order to love, we must first understand love. God is love and that love is manifested in Christ Jesus and works through you by the power of the Holy Spirit. Get to know the heart of Jesus. Spend the next 30 days in the Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John). Ask God to lead you to specific aspects of His love that He wants you to know and to see. Ask Him to reveal the Greatest Romance story of all time to you in a fresh new way. Ask Him to show you how to love your husband with a love like Jesus!

30 Dates in November Challenge

This post is Day 1 of the 30 Dates in November Challenge. To see other posts in this series, click here.

Share with Us

What excites you about this challenge? What concerns or fears do you have? How can we in the BHE community uplift you and pray for and with you? 

Linking Up with: Serving Joyfully and Raising Mighty Arrows


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    1. Now What? Day 31 and Beyond | Becoming His Eve

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