E – Do You Have Flood Insurance for Your Marriage & Linkup
E- Enduring the Storms of Marriage
Do You Have Flood Insurance?
Recently, my home state of Colorado was devastated by flash floods, rock, and mud slides. Unfortunately for many residents, home owner’s insurance is not the same as flood insurance, but that’s not as devastating as being caught without any insurance. Without insurance, recovery can be expensive and sometimes even impossible. Clinging to anything but the insurance & assurance of God is bedrock for failure and leaves your marriage vulnerable.
- Psalm 146:3 “Don’t put your trust in princes or a son of man, for in them, there is no salvation.”
- Proverbs 28:26 “Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom [personified in Christ] will be delivered.”
- Jeremiah 17:5 “Cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength, whose heart turns away from the Lord...”
When the storms of marriage prevail, be founded with the insurance & in the assurance of Christ.
- Psalm 46:1-2 “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea.”
- Psalm 91:1 “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.”
- Hebrews 6:19 “We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain…”
Securing the Dam Against a Flood of Lies
When you begin to cling to things other than Christ, you become vulnerable to the lies of the Devil. Some of these lies may include…
- God can’t redeem my marriage or bring healing to my marriage
- My past/his past will always negatively affect our marriage
- Marriage is merely a contract that I can break if I’m unhappy
- My spouse will never change
- I can never change
- We’re too different to be compatible
- I’ve lost that lovin’ feeling and can never get it back
You can better endure the storms of marriage if you secure the dam against the flood of Satan’s lies!
If you have believed or do believe any of these lies… cling to these promises instead:
1. God can redeem and heal anything!
Nothing is impossible for God. He can redeem even the most broken of marriages, and bring healing in even the most painful situations.
- Psalm 103:-2-4 “Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and forget not all His benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy…”
- Psalm 147:3 “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”
[Does this mean you should stay in your abusive relationship? No woman (or man) should ever have to take abuse and if you are in this kind of situation – PLEASE seek outside help! Separation from your abusive spouse is extremely important but doesn’t necessarily mean divorce.]
2. God can grant you freedom from your past!
I had two rocky relationships before my husband. I came to a point where I believed I wasn’t deserving of love, I didn’t deserve a good, godly man, and no godly man would ever love me in spite of my mistakes. God proved me wrong! Adam has been a wonderful part of my healing process. While I still struggle with some of the ramifications from my mistakes, I no longer am bound by them. I have been freed.
- Galatians 5:1 “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.”
- 2 Timothy 1:7 “…for God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.”
3. Marriage is for life.
God intended one man to be with one woman when He designed marriage. Marriage is not merely a legal contract. Marriage is a covenant. Don’t merely avoid conflict and then throw in the towel because you’re unhappy. Commit to working to the root of issues between you & your spouse. Commit to keeping Christ at the center.
“Place me as a seal over your arm; for love is as strong as death…” Song of Songs 8:6. Marriage covenant is forever. It is an eternal seal, until death parts you. When you enter a marriage covenant before your family, friends, and community, it’s not just the two of you who are bound together. It is God who binds you together. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
4. God can change your spouse!
Remember you married a sinner. Your spouse isn’t perfect, and you shouldn’t expect them to be. Ask God to search your heart to reveal any bad expectations you have for your spouse. If there truly is an issue your spouse is struggling with that is negatively affecting your marriage, you can’t change your husband, but God can. Trust that God is working, even if you don’t see the results. Commit to regularly praying for your spouse.
- James 5:16 “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”
- 1 Peter 5:7 “Cast your cares on Him for He cares for you.”
5. You can change!
Being unwilling to change is sinful. Proverbs 25:6 says, “Like a muddied spring or a polluted fountain is the person who gives way before the wicked.” If you truly have been changed by Christ, you need to live in Christ – and that means being willing to turn away from sin.
- Galatians 2:20 “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who lives, but Christ who lives in me.”
- James 4:7 “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. “
- James 1:22 “Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.”
6. You’re can work toward unity
Saying “we’re too different to be compatible” gives you a license to be selfish and reason to be unwilling to try. You may not be compatible but you chose to be together – and that makes you more compatible than you realize. Compatibility takes work.
- 1 Peter 3:1, 7-8″ Wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct…Husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered… be like-minded, sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble…” [What’s up with the weaker vessel part?]
- Ephesians 4:2 “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.”
- Philippians 2:3-4 “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. In humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”
7. Love is an action, not a feeling.
Love is more than just an emotional response to someone. Love requires action. Marital love requires work, and tons of it. You may not always “feel” in love, but you are called to love your spouse anyway. Jesus is the perfect example of love in action. 1 John 4:7-8 says, “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
- 1 John 4:9-12 “This is how God showed His love among us: He sent His one and only Son into the world that we might live through Him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and His love is made complete in us.”
- Ephesians 5:1, 21-29″Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us… Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which He is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to Himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church...”
Love is ultimately about sacrifice – about dying to self and living in Christ. Love your spouse as Christ loved you!
*See other posts in the ABCs of Marriage series!
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Share with Us
What lies have you caught yourself believing in your marriage? In what ways do you and your spouse guard against those lies? In what ways, do you and your spouse prepare for the storms of life?