Go Ahead! Be “That” Couple! 14 Things to Do In and Out of Bed with Your Husband, Day 5
Today’s Get Real Valentine challenge is physical affection!
No marriage can thrive without physical affection.
George Clerie writes in 6 Powerful Tips to Make Your Marriage Thrive, “Think of your relationship as having an affection account. We need to deposit into that account every day.”
Even the smallest things can make a difference in a marriage.
How can you deposit “affection” into your husband’s account today?
“Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth – for your love is more delightful than wine.” Song of Songs 1:2 (NIV)
“And you, my dear lover—you’re so handsome!And the bed we share is like a forest glen.” Song of Songs 1:16 (MSG)
“You have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride;you have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes…” Song of Songs 4:9 (NIV)
14 Things to Do In and Out of Bed with Your Husband
- Let your husband know when sex is pleasurable… during sex. “Ooo’s” and “ahh’s” are greatly appreciated. Show him where you want his hands, his lips, his groin, etc, and then reinforce what he’s doing well by vocalizing your delight.
- Let your husband know when sex is pleasurable… after sex. Men need positive reinforcement. They need to know what they’re doing right. Good sex can become Great sex when you tell him!
- Remind your husband of how great sex was the last time you did it… and do it often! Send him a text or email at work (on a phone/computer no one else will see preferably). Slip a note into his lunchbox, briefcase, car, etc. Write him a note on the bathroom mirror (use a code phrase if you have kiddos or you share a bathroom). Let him know over a meal by sharing knowing, flirtatious looks.
- Find a way to let your husband know when you want him…and you’re in public. There’s something about desiring the forbidden that really turns guys (and sometimes gals) on. You whisper in his ear, squeeze a body part, or use a secret shared code phrase when driving in the car, shopping together, at a restaurant or a friend’s house, etc. (*Important Side Note: Don’t let on that you want sex when you can’t or won’t follow through, barring extreme circumstances. Guys hate it when we women do that!)
- Love on your husband in public. Hug him randomly for no other reason except that you love him. Slap his butt gently. Pull him close for a passionate kiss out of the blue >> I particularly like doing this in parking lots! ;o)
- Flirt. Often.
- Appeal to your husband’s visual side. Wear something sexy. Often. Or better yet, wear nothing at all when he’s not expecting it and wait for his reaction.
- Surprise your husband by initiating sex every once in awhile. He’ll appreciate it. Trust me.
- Appreciate your man’s physicality. Stop for a moment sometime and just admire him whether he’s getting out of the shower or fixing something around the house, whether he’s climbing into bed for the night or he’s getting out of bed in the morning. Allow your eyes to linger and savor the moment. I heard it said once by Mark Driscoll, pastor of the Mars Hill Church, that your ideal beauty and level of attraction is measured by your spouse and your spouse only. This means that even if hubby has put on some weight recently, even if he’s got an overbite or a gap between his teeth, even if he has to wear glasses (which I personally adore my husband in glasses), he’s the most attractive man in your life… period.
- Indulge your honey and give him a sensual massage. You might need to hop in the shower afterward if things get “too hot.”
- Set the alarm clock a little earlier and enjoy wake-up sex. Don’t stress about the day and think about the million and one things you have to do. Just let loose and give it your full effort.
- Make out. Remember when you were so in love you couldn’t get enough of each other? Settle in for some lip-locking action. Just don’t forget to come up for air.
- Go ahead. Be “that” couple. You’re married! Enjoy your love and delight in each other’s company. A little PDA won’t hurt anyone.
- Low libido got you down? Check out this awesome post 7 Simple Ways to Depressurize Valentine’s Day (for low-libido wives) from Pearl’s Oyster Bed. I particularly like the laughter idea – laugh with your husband! And relax! As Pearl writes, “Generally, he doesn’t care how extravagant your lovemaking is. Lovemaking with his lady is ecstasy for him.”
*Editor’s Note: Due to Internet connectivity issues, I might not be online as often and won’t be able to respond as quickly to emails. You may have also noticed that I’m not on Twitter or other social media as often. This should hopefully get resolved within a few days.*
- Posted in: 5 Love Languages ♦ Real Marriage ♦ Romance ♦ Sex ♦ Special Events and Holidays ♦ Spicing Up the Bedroom
- Tagged: Acts of Service, Admiration, Attraction, Being a Lover, Get Real Valentine Series, Laughter and Humor, Physical Affection & Attention, Spicing Up Sex, Valentine's Day, Words of Affirmation