Sabbath Rest and Sex, Day 18

God rested on the Sabbath day. Give your husband the day off. Don’t run errands. Don’t spend elaborate time making meals. Take today to reflect on the goodness of our awesome God, to worship him, and to honor your husband.

Develop a Sunday tradition suggests the Generous Wife. It can be as simple as going for a walk together, taking a nap in each other’s arms, Sabbath sex, etc. Sundays are a day for worship and fellowship. I disconnect from my computer and try to limit my electronic devices usage. Sundays we typically go out to eat with his family and it’s great to fellowship and enjoy good food together. What are some of your Sunday traditions?

I used this challenge back in April for the Love is in the Air Dare, but I think it’s worth repeating:

Sex is meant to be good in marriage. Sex is meant to be wonderful, fulfilling, inspiring, unifying, beautiful, enjoyable, exciting, passionate, steamy, lovely, entertaining (at times), and even fun! Too often we don’t talk about sex within marriage as a beautiful thing, as more than just a necessary thing or a duty.

As Sheila Wray Gregorie, author of To Love, Honor, and Vacuum – Real Marriage. No Pretensions, writes (and I’m paraphrasing a bit) “Satan does everything he can to convince couples to have all the sex they want before marriage, and after marriage, he does everything he can to get them to stop.

Don’t be one of these couples! Don’t be one of these wives who just does it to “please her husband” or out of obligation. Let me let you in on a little secret: You were designed to be sexy, beautiful, and confident! You were designed to be whole, and to wholly participate in the love-making act with your husband… and to enjoy it! 

Common misconception about Christian wives is that we’re prudes or that we could care less about sex or that we don’t like it. NOT TRUE! There are many women out there, like Sheila, who are trying to change that misconception. Marriage sex is fun.

I’d highly recommend… 

…watching the Peasant Princess series by Mark Driscoll of the Mars Hill Church with your spouse (or on your own). It’s a wonderful series on the book of Song of Solomon.

I challenge you…

…to read the book of Song of Solomon with your husband – it’s only 8 short chapters. Ask God to open your eyes and your heart to a new way of looking at lovemaking and pray for sexual confidence, enjoyment, unity, and fulfillment in your marriage. It’s okay to let loose. Remember…

You are safe and secure within marriage. 

You are loved within marriage. 

You are free within marriage. 

For other WONDERFUL thoughts… 

…on Song of Solomon and embracing your sex life wholly, read Shannon Etheridge’s Hot Tip #81: Embrace Passion.

For a preview, she writes, “I also believe Song of Solomon was written not just as a celebration of love, relationship, marriage, and sex, but also of how God designed the human body and brain such that our senses are incredibly heightened under the influence of such passion.”

Check out this good click: Forget Friday Night Expectations & Shoot for Sabbath Sex by Shannon Etheridge. She writes, “’That sounds so sacrilegious!’” you might be saying. Girlfriend, it may not have been taught in Sunday school, but sex within marriage is in NO way sinful, regardless of what day of the week it is! Sex is an act of worship (our way of saying, ‘We choose YOUR plan of satisfying each other’s sexual needs within the confines of our marriage bed, God, just the way you intended it!’), so why not enjoy sex on a Sunday?

***A CAUTIONARY WORD ABOUT FREEDOM – Freedom does not mean engaging in sex world-style. Sex was designed for one man and one woman in marriage – it does not include extra individuals in any way, shape, or form. Freedom doesn’t mean treating your spouse with disrespect or forcing him (or you) to do anything you feel is degrading, uncomfortable, wrong, or sinful. Freedom doesn’t mean being prideful, but repeat this statement to yourself: feeling sexy isn’t sinful.***

Freedom means allowing yourself be passionate, allowing yourself to be pleasured and to give pleasure wholeheartedly. Freedom means engaging in lovemaking wholly – mind, body, heart, and spirit. 

Mind – Be fully present during sex. Put off distractions and eliminate as many as possible prior to starting. Allow yourself to focus only on your husband’s and your intimacy.

Body – This one is pretty straightforward – give yourself freely. Don’t hold back and don’t be shy.

Heart – Be emotionally connected to your husband. Don’t just “do it.” Take time to meet one another’s needs, to fully express your love to one another. Don’t feel like you have to rush. Make sure each of you knows that he (or she)  is loved, honored, and respected.

Soul- Sex is souly unifying (no pun intended…okay, maybe pun intended). When you come together in that intimate way, you connect on a level you cannot with any other human. Be fully immersed in each other’s love and pleasure. Open yourself up to be intricately and uniquely tied together. Sex is when two unique individuals, a husband and wife, bring their uniqueness into the marriage and blend together as one lovingly, passionately, and freely.

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9 Comments

  1. Anne

    I love sex on Sabbath. I’ve heard that sex is a “double mitzvah” (blessing) on Sabbath. I think that we are even more blessed when we really break with society and actually celebrate Sabbath on the seventh day, like in the bible. A triple blessing!

    • You’re absolutely right. There’s something about intimacy on the Sabbath that’s just so much better. Thanks for visiting.

  2. Great post! This definitely speaks to the deep need in our lives and marriages for being intentional… intentional in the ways we build intimacy, nurture time together, etc. THANK YOU for such awesome reminders that such intentionality is not only possible, but it is what God desires for our lives and marriages as well!

    • Thank you for your kind comments. Marriages absolutely must be intentional. We’re in it for the long, wonderful, messy, crazy, amazing, loving haul, and if we’re not intentional, we aren’t glorifying God or honoring our spouses.

  3. Thank you for the honor!

Trackbacks

  1. Breaking Free, Day 3 | Becoming His Eve
  2. 30 Dates in November: What About Sex? | Becoming His Eve
  3. 2012 in review & What to Look Forward to in 2013 | Becoming His Eve
  4. 49 BEST Sex and Marriage Posts of 2012 | Intimacy in Marriage

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