And God Said, “It Was Not Good?”

Editor’s Note: This is Part 9 in the Portrait of Eve series.

It Was Not Good?

Have you ever wondered why God doesn’t say “and it was good” after creating Eve? Let’s back up and review the whole story. Creation begins in the blankness, darkness, and void. God merely speaks and light is born. And God says that it is good. Then God separates the heavens from the earth and waters from the land. And God says that it is good. Next God speaks forests and valleys, flowers and trees, stars and planets into being. Birds and fish and then animals take shape. And this was all good.

It is more astonishing than we could imagine. From water and stone, to pomegranate and rose, to leopard and nightingale, creation ascends in beauty,” writes John and Stacie Eldredge in Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul. And then God decides to make man in His own image, a man called Adam, a son of God. And Adam was good.

But God is NOT finished! Every other creature had a partner on earth, but not Adam. God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper [a sustainer-beside-him] suitable for him.”

Dear daughter of God, you are the crown of creation, the final masterpiece – you are beautiful and you are good! Adam may have been a son of God, but you, daughter of Eve, were created because Adam desperately needed her. Without you, the world is incomplete.

Created for Relationship

Eve, Woman, was created for relationship, to be romanced. Can you imagine what Adam and Eve’s relationship was like before the Fall? They were perfect. Their bodies became one, and they touched the depth of each other’s soul. Eve was the answer to Adam’s loneliness, to his lack of a partner, to his thirst for beauty. Man was there in the Garden with the Creator God as His King and Friend… and yet it wasn’t good.

The world is young and completely unstained. Adam is yet in his innocence and full of glory. He walks with God. Nothing stands between them. They share something none of us has ever known, only longed for: an unbroken friendship, untouched by sin. Yet something is not good? Something is missing? What could it possibly be? Eve. Woman. Femininity. Wow. Talk about significance” (Eldredge).

Dear woman of God, you were made for relationship and romance. You were designed to have a deeply personal relationship with the Creator King of the Universe. It’s hard work to romance a woman’s heart, but God does this perfectly – He sustains you, crowns you with glory, bestows His beauty on you, loves you unconditionally, gives you the gift of relationship and redeems your heart and soul.

You were also designed to be Adam’s wife, lover, and friend, to join him on the journey of life, to give him your beauty, to be his sustainer-beside-him. But how many women these days are in happy and healthy relationships? Or the other extreme – how many women take over, constantly “saving” or trying to change their man?

Broken But Not Beyond Hope

Relationships have been broken since the Fall. But all is not over. There was another perfect Son of God. The first reference of this Son is actually in Genesis 3:15, “And I will put enmity between you and the woman,and between your offspring and hers;  he will crush your head, and you will strike his heel.” The Son of God came to earth to live and teach, but He was subjected to torture in the end, betrayed by His own people. You see, we deserve death, but He took our sins upon His shoulders, “was pierced for our transgressions…crushed for our iniquities.”  He rose again on the third day according to Scriptures, victorious, stamping out sin and death. We have been redeemed, ladies, and oh what a privilege! Isaiah 44:21 says, “I have swept away your offenses like a cloud, your sins like the morning mist. Return to Me, for I have redeemed you.”

The Proverbs 31 woman, remember her? The Lady Next Door? You don’t have to feel like you’re running but can never catch up to her. She is meant to be a guide into godly womanhood and femininity, not an impossible standard.

Verse 12 says, “She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.” The “him” mentioned here is her husband. Was Eve doing her husband good, not harm when she took of the fruit and offered it to him beside her? No. But your relationship doesn’t have to be like that.

In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death — even death on a cross!” Philippians 2:5-8

Take a lesson from Christ. Eve wanted to be equal to or greater than God. But Christ didn’t take advantage of His equality, and humbled Himself even unto death on a cross, making Himself nothing. When you are consciously seeking to be more like Christ, you become diminished and God grows bigger in your life. If you truly want to do your husband good, you need to humble yourself and exalt Christ.

He Jumped on the Grenade

*SPOILER ALERT* When you’re watching a movie or reading a novel, doesn’t your heart get excited knowing that the hero is putting himself in harm’s way to save woman, that he’s willing to even die? This is exactly what Christ did for us. And this is what Christ calls a husband to do for his wife – to give himself up for her in order to love her, making her holy, purifying her, overseeing her spiritual well-being, and presenting her spotless before God. In return, He calls us, as women, to do our husbands good and not harm by respecting and submitting to the authority of our husbands.

Last night Adam and I were watching Captain America. Before he was the superhero that we all know him as, Captain America was just a boy from Brooklyn named Steve Rodgers who desperately wanted to serve his country during World War II. But because of his size and long list of health issues, he is continually denied entry to the army. He finally gets a break when a German defect scientist sees something in him beyond the puniness and potential of a perfect soldier – a good man. Steve struggles through boot camp in order to be selected to become America’s first super soldier. During a workout, a grenade gets thrown into the group and while all the other soldiers scatter, Steve jumps on the grenade and yells, “Get back,” intending to sacrifice himself for everyone. The grenade is a dud, but the point is, Steve didn’t run away from danger and pain. He faced it. He was willing to sacrifice even his own life.

When Adam and I first started dating, I had a problem with facing conflict. I ran away, afraid to confront pain. Adam changed everything for me. I remember one rainy night he came running toward me like the father does in the story of the prodigal son and instead of being angry at me, he welcomed me back with open arms and loved me. And that’s how I knew I wanted to marry him. Something I admire about my husband is that he doesn’t run away from pain. He faces it. He never wants to leave conflict unresolved. And while I’m still learning and it takes everything in me not to run away sometimes, I stay because I love my husband and he has been willing to sacrifice everything for me – the ultimate picture of love, and because of that, I am willing to sacrifice everything for him, and this reminds me to sacrifice everything for my God who loves me profoundly and passionately.

I’d Love to Hear from You

Dear married lady, do you do good toward your spouse? Do you consciously seek to avoid hurting him? Christ gave up everything to bring us back into right relationship with Him and He calls us to daily take up our crosses, denying ourselves, humbling ourselves, and follow Him. God designed the relationship between a husband and wife to be a picture of this – a denial of self, a humble service to the other, a sacrifice. How willing are you to sacrifice for your husband?

And for those of you not married, how big is God in your life? Is He small because you’re unwilling to budge and give up everything for Him… maybe even the dream of marriage, or the perfect job, or children? Or is He steadily growing because you’re daily submitting to His authority? Are you doing good – are you serving others – as you are waiting on the Lord? Or are you making selfish decisions without even realizing the harm you are doing to others, to yourself?

These are tough questions. Take some time to seek the Lord, facing Him rather than running away, and ask Him to search your heart.

If you’d like to share your stories or struggles, please feel free to leave a comment below or EMAIL ME. What about this post resonated with you?

Related Posts:

1. What We Were Designed For A Portrait of Eve introduction – the woman you were created to be. 

2. Under the Arm and Near the Heart Part 1 – A position of honor and glory and a look at what it means to be a help-meet 

3. The Scary “S” Word Part 2 – Did submission exist prior to the Fall? And what does it mean to be submissive in marriage? 

4. Looking for Love in All the Right Places Part 6 – ”…Turn your eyes upon Jesus for you will not find satisfaction anywhere but in the arms of your Lover God who will carry you into eternity.”

5. Don’t Be Intimidated by the Lady Next Door Part 7 – “Isn’t it so tempting for us as women to get caught up in comparing ourselves to others?” 

To see other posts in this series, click here.


6. This Little Game Called Envy Part 3 in the Biblical Garden of Love series – Why are we so envious? Because we forget our specifically designed role… 




    1. Doing Your Husband Good, Day 20 | Becoming His Eve
    2. The “Real” Campaign for Real Beauty | Becoming His Eve

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